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My first "professional" short film- thoughts?

TheAnthonyYa's picture
Last seen: 3 years 11 months ago
Joined: 11/27/2010 - 11:41pm

Hi, I'm a student filmmaker who's new to these forums. I've been making shitty little short videos for two years, but at the end of the last school year I worked with a production theater next to my school to make this sketch. And I'm just looking for opinions on it.

When I watch it, my only change would be to add more jokes. The video is basically one long joke, but if I could change it I would add more jokes in general. But yeah, thank you for any criticism or whatnot!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tVizgS6843M


MediaFish's picture
Last seen: 1 year 4 months ago
Joined: 05/25/2011 - 2:06pm

Not to be too harsh but - what makes this a professional short film? Did some one pay you to film and produce it? Again, not to be harsh but you state - "When I watch it, my only change would be to add more jokes" - really? What about sound, color balance, lighting, acting, the truck engine that starts out of nowhere as Man Man leaves on his scooter, the female coughing at the end of the joke or her bad wig she is wearing? My thought is that it needs a lot of work - sorry I am sure that wasn't what you wanted to hear but you asked.

I am really curious though why you think this is\should be considered a professional film.

Jeff Media Fish Productions



composite1's picture
Last seen: 7 months 4 weeks ago
Joined: 12/11/2008 - 7:54pm
Plus Member Moderator

Anthony,

This is by no means 'Pro'. YouTube Special, definitely. You need lights for your interior scenes, at minimum reflectors or bounce cards for your exteriors, consider doing voice-overs for your vocal tracks and lots more camerawork. Student film at best right now.

On the other hand, a clever idea with lots of potential. Do as Grinner said, 'keep shooting'. Push the envelope with this thing. Believe it or not, 'Average' has a lot of lattitude and you can make this thing the hilarious series it could be, if you go out to the edges with your writing. Pro? Not yet. But the potential is there so you're ahead in the game.

H.Wolfgang Porter, Composite Media Producer Dreaded Enterprises Unlimited, Inc. www.dreadedenterprises.com


birdcat's picture
Last seen: 2 years 2 months ago
Joined: 10/21/2005 - 10:09am

Anthony -

I would echo what the others have said but take heart in that these criticisms are very constructive and can be solved using technical means and practice in filming and editing (while others will argue the point, you can fix a wealth of issues in post, just takes a lot longer than if you have it good on tape first time).

What you do have is a story (albeit not one I would watch twice) and some vision of what you want to say and show - Try to develop that as it is not only a good thing to have in creating video, but in still photography, writing and public speaking and will serve you well in future years.

Hone your technical skills and spend time developing your minds eye and practice, practice, practice at bringing those two things closer to excellent.

Bruce Paul 7Squared Productions http://www.7squared.com